Now, if you’ve been reading my (somewhat updated) blog for any length of time, you’ll know that my future mother in law is absolutely batshit nuts.  In the last 10 months she has:

– Called me a gold digger
– Decided I am rude for not intruding upon her discussions with her guests across the yard to introduce myself
– Threatened LAboy that I better not get pregnant and expect her to foot the bill
– Called the pound on our neighbor’s dog because she is “sick and tired” of her “arm getting pulled off” by her overly-excited dog that never gets out
– Feeds raccoons in 4 baby pools in her backyard nightly
– Ignored the fact that we got engaged
– Wrote letters discussing the fact that if we want anything fixed in our home that is owned by her husband and his siblings (yet she is convinced it’s “her” rental property) we must send a letter, one item at a time, for it to be discussed and weighed as to whether or not it should actually be fixed (see: sewage leak in my back yard)

The most confusing thing is that moments after screaming at our neighbor, she was then asking for gardening tips.  She says horrible things about me and tells LAboy a week later we should all be friends.  I don’t know what to do, except know to be wary when she’s nice because the shit’s gonna hit the fan.

Is she bipolar or just crazy?  I have no idea, but so help me God, if that woman looks at my dog cross-eyed there’s gonna be a hell of a lot less raccoons in this town ASAP.  My neighbors have shotguns and raccoons look a whole lot like the skunks they shoot to keep them away from our dogs at night…

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